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You can ask anybody you care to mention among the world's Hobie Cat sailors and you will not get a real answer to this question. What you will get is reasons why not to pitchpole, techniques to help stop you from pitchpoling, or safety measures to be taken in the event of a pitchpole. But none of them will answer the simple question, "Why pitchpole?"

So I went elsewhere and asked the world's greatest experts of the "Why?" question. Here is the sum of the world's wisdom on this most vexing of problems.

Albert Einstein:
Whether the Hobie pitchpoled to the water or the water pitchpoled to the Hobie is relative upon your frame of reference.

Aristotle:
The Hobie pitchpoled to actualize its potential.

Captain James T. Kirk:
To go boldly where no Hobie has gone before.

Carl Gustav Jung:
The constellation of archetypes in the collective unconscious necessitated that the Hobie pitchpole at this psychological juncture, therefore syncronicity brought this particular pitchpole into being.

Charles Darwin:
It was the next logical step after coming down from the trees.

Don Corleone:
That Hobie didn't pitchpole. It was planted there by the police.

Douglas Adams:
Forty two.

Eeyore:
Nobody cares. Pathetic, that's what it is, pathetic.

Epicurus:
For the pleasure involved.

Hippocrates:
Because of an excess of phlegm in its pancreas.

Jack Kevorkian
The Hobie pitchpoled voluntarily after of a series of intravenous injections self-administered in my presence. The appropriate legal papers have been signed in the presence of my solicitors.

Karl Marx:
The pitchpole of the people is an historical inevitability.

Lao-tse:
To answer that question you must enter the harmony of your own pitchpole nature. That is all for today.

Mark Twain:
The news of my pitchpole has been greatly exaggerated.

Nietzsche:
Because if you gaze too long at the pitchpole, the pitchpole also gazes at you.

Oliver North:
Because national security was at stake.

Plato:
Hobies pitchpole for the greater good.

Ronald Reagan:
I don't recall.

Saddam Hussein:
This was an unprovoked act of international terrorism and we were quite justified in dropping nerve gas canisters in the area.

Salvador Dali:
Because the clockface was melting over the edge of the table.

Sigmund Freud:
The pitchpole indicates the frustration of an innate phallic tendency.

Timothy Leary:
Because it is the only trip the establishment will allow.

Torquemada:
Give me five minutes with the Hobie and I'll find out.

XYZ Management Consultants:
Deregulation was threatening Pitchpole Market Topography (PMT). Hobie was faced with significant challenges to create and develop the competencies required for the newly competitive market. Our consulting company, in a Partner Integration Group (PIG) relationship with the client, helped Hobie by rethinking its physical Distribution Implementation Processes (DIP). By establishing the Hobie Aquaeus Relationship Model (HARM) we helped Hobie develop skills, methodologies, knowledge capital and experiences to align the sailing/pitchpole processes and technology in support of its overall strategy within a Program Management System (PMS). We then convened a diverse cross-spectrum of wind experts, water analysts and Hobie sailors along with consultants with deep skills in the pitchpole industry to engage in a two-day program of Diversional & Integrational Relativisation Training (DIRT) meetings in order to leverage their personal knowledge capital and to enable them to synergize with each other so as to achieve the implicit goals of delivering and successfully architecting and implementing a Framework Leveraging Enterprise-Wide (FLEW) type of value system across the continuum of pitchpole processes. The meeting was held in a Water Enabling Tank (WET) setting creating an impactful environment which was strategically based, industry-focused, and built upon a consistent, clear, and unified market message and aligned with the Hobie's mission, vision, and core values which we have been able to refine into the revision presently known as the Original Hobie-Skill Habituated & Internalised Training (OH-SHIT) model. This was conducive towards the creation of a total business integration solution. We therefore helped the Hobie change its strategy to become more successful in Pivoting Into That Cold Hard Place Often Located In & Near Gybes (PITCHPOLING).