Maybe some old-time catamaran humor from the archives?
Come on, tell us your best beachcat related stories or jokes.
Top Ten Worst Things To Hear From Your Crew
10. Jibsheet? What's that?
9. What do you mean, take off my spiked golf shoes?
8. Wow! We went the whole day without one pictchpo.... AAAAHHHH!!!
7. Let's go get a closer look at those jetskis.
6. Mind if I light up this cigar?
5. Here comes the coastguard. Did I mention I that I have a 10lb bag of cocaine in my shorts?
4. You've had your laugh. Now help me get my head out of the trampoline lacing.
3. We're sure to win. I brought my lucky anvil collection.
2. But... I thought you put the hull plugs in.
From the September 1996 issue of "On The Wire eZine", by Bill Mattson
Me & Kevin (RIP) were setting up the Hobie 16 at a little lake in Central Indiana. A farmer looking fellow walked by and said, "That's a nice coupla boats Ya got there".
Ahhhh! Make it stop!!!! Make it stop! (snowing... crappy, cold weather!)
We've had nothing but ice ice baby. Last Saturday it rained ice after the snow. Everything is iced over still. Can't even walk out to the chicken coup without sliding down a very gentle slope on the hard show/ice, and I'm at least 230lbs with winter boots/clothing on, these winter days (too heavy!).
Our rural roads are not yet cleared.... all almost impenetrable ice. The other day I tried to clear the ice from a sharp corner in our county road, near the end of my driveway.... the poor tractor (80 hp, 4x4 Ford 5030) could barely get the shovel under the ice and all four wheels would spin as the tractor moved sideways.
And.... we're due to get MORE SNOW this evening and tomorrow! Make it stop! I'm sure you guys in Minnesota and other Northern States are laughing. Yeah, I'm originally from the snowbelt in Ohio, but I've never encountered this much hard, thick ice being EVERYWHERE before. Even on the grass!Â
Anyway, back to crazy times while cat sailing....
Back in 1989 we at Geneva (Ohio) Catamaran Sailing Club had a bunch of races, but one is somewhat memorable in that the CG decided to harass me and my crew (wife).Â
It was a beautiful summer's day, with fresh winds from the SW making for a flying Easterly broad reach down the coast, then a close reach back, roughly a 10-mile race with a turning point just off the beach with a large antenna as the landmark.
We had a perfect start and for the first quarter of the first leg, we were well in front of the pack, having a fun, exciting sail in the freshening breeze, sailing about a mile offshore.
Then we see a coast guard boat.... all aluminum, about 35 ft long, approaching the pack from our sterns. We notice him making his way through the fleet. What the heck?! Then he pulls up to our port, then to our starboard, and then hails us to stop. What the heck!?!
One of the CG guys asks "where's your boat numbers?!"Â
Well, clearly they're on our H18's boom. Duh.
I motion to our boom. Big, bright numbers and state decal.
He again yells " Pull over and stop!"
I yell back "Yeah, we're in a race, we have our numbers on the boom!" and grumble (quietly) something about him going away.
"Pull over!"
So, we begrudgingly comply and heave-to as the rest of the fleet fly by us.
"Your numbers should be on your bows, not on the boom. You are not in compliance... "
"Well sir, more than once, I've had the numbers on my bows torn off from the high speed flow of water and I've also have lost a state decal, so I put them all on the boom where they're more protected."
CG: "All the other boats have their numbers and decal on their bows..."
"yeah, well, they may not sail as much and as fast as we do in rough conditions!" (which might have been true)
Eventually he let us go on our way without any citations. We had a lot of ground to make up.Â
The CG crew must have been bored that day to chase a fleet of cats racing down the coast.
Everyone had a good laugh back at the clubhouse on the beach.
What is this 'snow,' of which you speak?
What is this 'snow,' of which you speak?
😡 I'm in Memphis and the snow/ice we got would be absolutely nothing up North, but it has us paralyzed. Six inch mix of snow/sleet/ice with a very unusual stretch of below freezing temps. Going single digits again tomorrow.
I've been basically trapped at home since last Saturday. Bright side was since it was so cold nothing stuck to the trees and powerlines, so no power outages. But the stuff that is on the ground is hard as a rock, I tried to use a post-hole digger to break up my driveway and walk with no luck.
Much worse to the South where they got nothing but ice and power down everywhere.Â
But the stuff that is on the ground is hard as a rock, I tried to use a post-hole digger to break up my driveway and walk with no luck.
The stuff looks like snow but it feels like bricks, igloo building instead of snowmen.
We (Surry Co., NC) received another 'boat-load' of snow this past weekend. Around 6"-8", lots of wind, and very cold temps... this morning it was 3 degrees F.Â
This week the temps are supposed to be above freezing for most of the day-time, up to 50 deg F. on Friday!Â
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Punxsutawney Phil might see his shadow today if it's bright and sunny there like it is here. Sadly, that means a delay in nice sailing weather around here.
Unlike my user name infers, I'm now in Florida, and it's Winter. Lows were down to 25 yesterday and 23.7 last night. Houses down here have exterior plumbing and heat pumps, we're not built for that. The Gasparilla pirate parade this weekend was cold with howling winds. The Iguanas are all cold stunned, and Florida Wildlife is busy collecting them for disposal as they are exotic species. Strawberries are in season here and the farmers have been spray irrigating at night, so all the fields are sparkling in the morning sun.
Ouch. I will refrain from rubbing any San Diego salt into any wounds.
Ouch. I will refrain from rubbing any San Diego salt into any wounds.
Why would anyone here be pouting about you providing more salt?! Send it our way!
Just do us a favor... eh? Go get an awesome day of sailing for us all frozen over here.
As far as stories go - I would be really interested to hear from any saltwater sailors about shark encounters (or other interesting marine life). The seemingly regular occurrence of shark/human interactions in CA and FL makes me think someone would have encountered something at some point?
My closest sea life encounter was not on a beach cat, but windsurfing in Florida many years ago as a young college student I was sailing on the Indian River / Intercoastal Waterway in Melbourne. Â I was in the shallows and happened to clip a manatee with my fin, causing me to be knocked off the board. Â I jumped back on my board scared sh..less and sailed back to my launch as quick as possible. All I knew in that instant was it was something big and I was in its territory. Â
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As far as stories go - I would be really interested to hear from any saltwater sailors about shark encounters (or other interesting marine life). The seemingly regular occurrence of shark/human interactions in CA and FL makes me think someone would have encountered something at some point?
JAWS and JAWS II come to mind. 🤣Â
I had a brief encounter with a Bull shark while paddling my surfski (Epic V12) in one of the canals of Colington Harbour on the OBX (Kill Devil Hills,NC). I saw it's dorsal fin with it's tail swinging laterally, swimming slowly in thin, brackish water, so it wasn't a dolphin. It was in a very shallow portion of a canal. I got out of there at 12 mph... paddling fast but smoothly. I lived on the main canal and paddled, swam, or sailed nearly every day, and that encounter caught my attention.
There were plenty of dolphins in the Albemarle Sound that I have played with while paddling, but that was the only Bull that I had seen in many years of paddling and sailing in that region.
There's lots of big alligator-gar fish in Collington Harbour. You'll see them jump out the water sometimes, or bump into your boat. They look like they could do some damage to someone if they took a bite.
As far as stories go - I would be really interested to hear from any saltwater sailors about shark encounters (or other interesting marine life). The seemingly regular occurrence of shark/human interactions in CA and FL makes me think someone would have encountered something at some point?
Spent a ton of time in the Florida salt and never have seen a shark myself. There are a whole lot of them everywhere, and they cruise and feed along shorelines but harder to see than in the movies.
Have seen thousands of Dolphn though, they love to play in the wake of the boat or pace along side the bows. Have had them swim between the hulls and under the tramp too, so cool.
Coolest dolphin "encounter" was while going through the Destin pass during a Round The Island (Okaloosa and Santa Rosa Islands) there are often tall waves coming out of the pass to the Gulf. This time, I was sailing into nearly square faced waves, the morning light (race start is 7am) illuminated a group of dolphin that were swimming/surfing in there. It was like seeing them through the glass of an aquarium!
Here is one way I know there are plenty of sharks along the North Florida beaches.Â
I wish I could remember dudes name, but he is a badass! Rigged up his Hobie 16 as a deep sea fishing platform, rod holders and everything.Â
He would sail out through the surf at Grayton Beach and fish, caught lots of types but was after sharks.
Yes, these pics are real. Anyone know his name?
I have enough on my hands just sailing the boat - I can only imagine the disaster that would ensue if I tried to fish too!
Yes, these pics are real. Anyone know his name?
Maybe he goes by the handle "the Mariner" or "Ulysses".... ya know, the guy from WaterWorld, who takes off in the end on a catamaran after finding a lone atoll (Mount Everest)?
I've had several experiences on my Hobie with denizens of the deep.
We went out for 4th of July fireworks off Englewood Beach in the Gulf of Mexico. It was a clear evening with lots of Moon. As we returned, we sailed over a school of Tarpon and several rolled next to us.
I tied some PVC pipe to the corner castings and pulled a 2 oz diamond jig and a Clark spoon on a 3 way swivel. Caught several Mackerell.  One time off Stump Pass something hit the diamond jig, took drag and thru cut the 80lb leader.
Sailed next to several Sea Turtles.
Here in the Charlotte Harbor, we were coming back from a race. As we passed the pilings from an old dock there was a rock just ahead in 3 feet of water. As we got closer I saw that it was yellow and brown. When we got over it 4 feet of Jewfish came alive. It spooked turned around and splashed us while rocking the boat.
Closest story I have... I took my trailer in for some work and left the boat on it. My boat has wave piercing bows and I had the cat trax sitting on top of the hulls just ahead of the trampoline...
The guy at the trailer yard admired the boat for a bit and then asked, "Is it upside down?"
I've spent a lot of time sailing along the Gulf Coast, and have only seen one shark. It was about 10 feet long and shot straight up in the air (spinning wildly) off my windward port bow as I was trapped out sailing solo. It was up long enough to get a good look, and it weren't no dolphin...I've seen thousands of those. Have seen several sea turtles and had lots of baitfish, even mullet, flop up on the tramp as I blasted through them. Have hit cabbagehead jellyfish that are big/dense enough to kick up the rudders. (First time I heard that could happen, I called B.S., but later found out it's a fact.) Have also seen a pod(?) of 75-100 rays...thought it was just seagrass or such until they started moving and partially breaching. Craziest thing I guess was a giant ray....must have been 8 feet wide. We were parked and it came right at us...raised its head enough to tell its eyes were a foot apart...then it glided right under us across the space between the bows. I thought my brother-in-law was gonna' climb the friggin' mast!